GIT Internet Ringfence Review

Government Cutting the Internet!

News from the lobbies of Whitehall has trickled down the Fresh Food Group grapevine and we are shocked to hear that plans are being laid to cut the internet. The penny snatching politicians are planning to roll back versions of the internet in a money saving bid to cut costs and hike prices!

We here at the Fresh Food Group love fresh ideas and innovations so we were delighted to get the opportunity to review the GIT Internet Ringfence, the latest offering from General Information Technology Industries. Here is the promotional infomercial thingy:

Internet Ringfence Product Review

So we were delighted to have access to this innovative piece of kit… that delight did not last long. It became apparent very quickly that this was nothing more than a cut in half ruck sack turned inside out with some cheap garden wire stuck clumsily around the edges. There was an old style phone, car stereo and some wires stuck to the wire mesh – but that was as technical as it gets.

When meeting Tory McGill, who describes himself as “Turbo charged wild dog of IT innovation, an organic dynamo of unilateral diversification hell bent on delivering cost efficiency through innovative IT solutions.” it became apparent that he was utterly insane. The persona in the infomercial is not a persona; he is genuinely like that in real life – mad as a Spaniard’s purse.

When asked how the Ringfence was powered Tory McGill replied, “it is a wireless organic solar integrated into the IP mirrors,” then added, “it’s also fully kosher-degradable and suitable for atheist vegans.” This is about as far as we got before he began blithering about the sale of amenities and how water was now going to be known as Branson, after its name was sold to an anonymous English Businessman.

GIT Ringfence

The assistant you see modelling the GIT Ringfence obviously had some kind of serious head injury as a child, he was incapable of stringing a sentence together and just kept doing lunges sporting the so called internet Ringfence.

So unfortunately we don’t have a review about the GIT Ringfence because it is a collection of knick knacks glued together in a random mêlée of incompetence. If you see McGill then cross the road and run very fast in the opposite direction.